Hey guys it is that time of the week where we bring you another 'episode' from the memory banks of the legends of the game, the late Ace Ntsoelengoe and Banks Setlhodi through our editorial director, Peter du Doit, who is a former professional footballer himself. This week's 'episode' is from edition 285 of 4 September 2002.
Soccer-Laduma readers, we've got a double feature for you this week with Dennis, the goat who loved beer, and how Banks and Ace paid for their drinks at shebeens with big money - an enormous cheque in fact. And would you believe, they just kept on using the same cheque over and over again at different shebeens! Get ready for yet another strange and crazy adventure with the maestros.
Peter: Hi, guys, what's so funny? You're laughing so much.
Ace: No, man, it's Banksie - he just reminded me of a wonderful story from the old days.
Banks: Ha, ha … as usual … I am the one who has to keep reminding Ace. But first, how are you, Peter?
Peter: Hey, alive and kicking!
Ace: Good.
Banks: Ja …
Peter: Listen, guys, a reader, John Makhura, from Benoni asks a very interesting question. He says Banksie, that he saw a picture from an old newspaper of the late great 'Pro' Khumalo grabbing you by the shirt front. What was happening between the two of you? Why were you and Pro fighting?
Ace: Ha, ha.
Banks: No, no Peter, we were not fighting. Actually Pro was helping me. Serious. You see I was injured before the game and in those days we had no reserve goalkeeper. I was the only keeper. I had injured my neck in the previous game in Durban and I couldn't move my neck.
Ace: Ja … Banksie was like a pole. He couldn't turn, it was madness for him to even try to play.
Banks: So Pro was actually helping me up off the ground. We lost that game 4-1 to Witbank Aces at home at Orlando Stadium and one of the reasons why we got such a hiding was because of my sore neck.
Ace: But we got revenge in the second leg right in their home ground because we hammered them 7-0.
Peter: That's right, we spoke about that story previously.
Ace: You know, talking about Witbank Aces reminds me of Steve 'Disco' Makua, who was one of the best players ever to play for Aces. He was one of the best players in the country, in fact.
Peter: But I hear he's Disco no more. Why has his nickname now changed from Disco to Dennis?
Banks: Ha, ha, Ace will tell you that one.
Ace: Peter, you must remember in Durban I think in the early '90s there was a famous goat called Dennis.
Peter: Yes, yes.
Ace: Remember the goat used to go with his owner everywhere. To soccer games, to shebeens, to parties, to shopping centres, on taxis … everywhere. The goat thought that he was human. He even used to drink beer! In fact, Dennis was a helluva drinker and he and his owner were often seen staggering out of shebeens together.
Peter: Ha, ha … Dennis the Drunk!
Banks: Ja.
Ace: Anyway, one day Steve 'Disco' Makua was at a Masters game sporting a short grey beard - a goatee they call it and immediately all of us gave him the new nickname of Dennis because he looked like the famous goat from Durban, ha ha …
Peter: From Disco to Dennis...ha, ha. How does Steve feel about his new name?
Ace: He had no choice … that's what we call him now. In fact, he doesn't mind as long as he doesn't end up like the goat probably has, on somebody's braai! Actually, we tell Disco at our games that he better play well - otherwise we are going to put him on the braai!
Peter: Poor Steve Makua. Gents, another Soccer-Laduma reader says that in the early '80s he remembers the two of you walking into a shebeen with a massive cheque … a cheque even bigger than a person. So big that it took the two of you to carry it.
Ace: Ha, ha … ja, he's right.
Banks: No, man, you know what it was …
Peter: What?
Banks: It was after the 1981 or 1982 Mainstay Cup Final which we won. You know after the game, the officials of Mainstay gave us the trophy and also one of those big cheques. It's not a real cheque but just to show how much prize money winning the Cup was worth.
Ace: The cheque was for R125 000 which is like R2 million today … it was a huge amount of money.
Banks: Kaizer and the directors went to a function after the game and forgot the cheque in the dressing room so I took it and hid it in Ace's car. Later I took the cheque home with me and left it there. Then one day during the off-season break in December, Ace and I were playing tennis and we felt like a drink afterwards but neither of us had any money.
Ace: So Banks said, "Hold on, I've got an idea." The next minute he disappeared into his house and came out with the big cardboard cheque from Mainstay with R125 000 written on it. I just burst out laughing but Banksie said, "No, come on, let's go to the shebeen … we'll get drinks, you'll see!"
Banks: Hell, Peter, you wouldn't believe it. Once we got in the shebeen, everyone crowded round to look at the cheque. The owner and the customers were going to fetch their cameras to take photographs of themselves and the big cheque. With each picture taken, we got free drinks … Man, the cameras were clicking non-stop.
Ace: And the drinks were flowing … like a river … ha, ha.
Banks: I tell you what, after that episode, Ace and I used to take that cheque with us whenever we visited a different shebeen or shop.
Ace: Banks used to phone me and say, "Come, Ace, let's go show people the cheque." And off we'd go and, man, the people loved it. There must be so many people in South Africa who have photographs of themselves with the big cheque from Mainstay for R125 000. Why? Because we did it for the whole of the summer holidays, for at least two months …
Banks: But then I think Kaizer heard what we were doing and he sent a message that Chiefs wanted the cheque back so that was the end of that.
Peter: Maybe Kaizer heard how the cheque worked for you and he wanted to do the same!
Ace: Ha, ha …
Banks: Ha, ha … No, not Kaizer but, ja, it's a very funny thought!
Peter: Well, guys … let's hope the days of big cheques are not over for all of us yet!
Banks: Mhmm … we can only hope...and take it easy …
Ace: Ja, just like Sunday morning …
Ha, ha, ha we hope you guys enjoyed this crazy story from the legends and that you will feedback to us.
Cheers.
VJ
