Merry Christmas, everyone! We in Fan Park would like to wish you all a blessed day, but, first, we have assigned a few gifts for our favourite players, coaches and teams. Can you guess which gifts they are? Let’s take a look!
Click on the gallery to view images of what we mean!
Kaizer Chiefs Fans – A Dictionary
How many times this season has Amakhosi coach Steve Komphela left the public stunned with his complicated and hyperbolic comments? Plenty! A dictionary could help solve their misunderstandings in case they don't understand his pre- and post-match comments.
Lebohang Mokoena – A New Body
After enduring a couple of seasons plagued with injury, his arrival at Ajax Cape Town hasn't provided him with the green grass he was hoping for. A new body could save him a lot of hassle. If it were possible, of course...
Kaizer Chiefs – A Star
After Mamelodi Sundowns' success in Africa in September, the Glamour Boys are the only Big Three club without a star. Perhaps they could convince PUMA to sew complimentary stars on to their jerseys too…
Tendai Ndoro – An Idols Golden Ticket
The Orlando Pirates striker loves to sing. Yes, he LOVES to sing and he is pretty good at it too. If he ever finds himself not playing football for some reason, he could certainly be a great contender on Idols. Golden ticket all the way.
Thabo Matlaba – A Drum Set
"Festival" is always at the heart of Orlando Pirates' pre-match song and dance, and he can often be found banging a boot against a bin to make drumming noises. As such, we would like to gift him a drum set instead.
Steve Komphela – Bodyguards
He may be referred to as "Big Steve", but this season he has needed quite a bit of protection from angry fans. In his best interests, it is probably best he be assigned a personal bodyguard or two.
Chloorkop – A Bigger Trophy Cabinet
The trophy cabinet at Mamelodi Sundowns' Chloorkop headquarters is getting more and more full with each passing season. Because of this, a bigger trophy cabinet, or perhaps a room, is needed to put all the Brazilians' silverware on display.
Mamelodi Sundowns – A Manual On How To Play In FIFA Competitions
There is no doubting the past two years Sundowns have experienced, but after their disappointing display at the FIFA Club World Cup in Japan, perhaps someone should by them a manual on how to play in FIFA competitions.
Jimmy Tau, Gavin Hunt, Roger De Sa, Muhsin Ertugral – A Four-Ball On A Golf Course
All these men love to play a round of golf, and some of the best transfer deals are surely negotiated on the greens... Hence, we would like to see this quartet of former players battle it out in a four-ball at the golf course. Can you imagine the conversations?!
Shakes Mashaba – A Dummies' Guide To Talking To The Media
Despite many years of being in the public eye, Shakes still seemingly doesn't quite know how to handle the media. Perhaps a Dummies' Guide on how to approach the men with the recorders would be useful?
Augusto Palacios – Subtitles
He is Peruvian. His first language is Spanish. And sometimes it feels like he speaks his native language when he does post-match interviews. It would be great to have a running commentary of subtitles whenever he speaks!
Remember, this is purely meant for humour and to stir up a laugh on this joyous day. Which gift would you give your favourite players or team?