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Why Ace Called Malombo A Parrot

Last week, we found out how Kaizer Chiefs became the Glamour Boys. But who were the best and worst dressers? This week, Steve Maseko, the former Amakhosi defender, joins our pages again and he’s got a great story for us continuing on the glamour theme. Watch out for our surprise guest at the end of the story and discover what this man has to say in his defence …

 Peter: Ace, how are you, sir? 

Ace: Alive and kicking as usual. Also, instead of Banksie, this week I’ve brought Steve Maseko back, our Chiefs defender from the good old days. Steve’s got another great story.

 Peter: Steve Maseko, welcome once again.

Steve: Ja, it’s good to be back. I see Banksie was scared to be here with me, ha, ha. Well, he didn’t have anything to worry about because the story I’ve got is about Ace and Malombo Lechaba.

 Peter: Looks like Banksie’s missing out, ha, ha. Right, let’s go for it!

Steve: This was at the time that there was split in the NPSL. You know when there were two Pirates teams and two Swallows teams.

Peter: Sure.

Ace: And as you know, I started Ace Mates. We played in the NPSL.

Steve: Yes, and one day we were going to play in Namibia. After the game, Malombo Lechaba, Ace and myself, who were all sharing a room in the hotel in Windhoek, decided to go partying.

Ace: Ja, we had won and, as usual, a party was waiting to happen.

Steve: We had been invited to this party. Ace and I were getting dressed, you know looking nice. And the next minute we turned round and there was Malombo all dressed up...ha, ha.

 Peter: What? What was so funny?

Steve: Malombo was wearing green leather trousers, a yellow shirt, a green leather jacket and a green cap.

 Peter: No way!

Ace: Ha, ha, ja...serious! Listen Malombo was from Pretoria. He used to have his own colours, you know how those guys from Pretoria dress, even today. Malombo would wear brown trousers with a red shirt...anything. Only now has he come to order. 

 Peter: Ha, ha...

Ace: I promise you in the old days we were the Glamour Boys at Chiefs but Malombo would wear his clothes Pretoria style. 

Steve: Ja … no style, ha, ha.

Ace: Ha, ha. His trousers would be three quarters of the way down and you could see his skin and his socks...

 Peter: Ha, ha. So, Ace, who else at Kaizer Chiefs in those days made the Glamour Boys look unfashionable?

Ace: Malombo...and Johnny Mokoena. You see both of them were from Pretoria...those two used to bring our names down. We were all dressed like Americans, copying Kaizer and Ewert Nene. We had bellbottoms, flowered shirts, necklaces with peace signs...we looked like hippies. Actually, we copied Percy Sledge’s style as well.

 Peter: Now there’s a singer, “Come softly...”

Ace: Yeah.

 Peter: And what about Steve? How did he dress? 

Steve: Hey, hey!

Ace: He wasn’t a bad dresser you know...especially coming from Witbank. He was two points above Malombo, ha, ha.

Steve: Hey, take it easy, this story is supposed to be about Malombo Lechaba.

 Peter: So, Ace, who were the most fashionable dressers at Chiefs? Who were the Glamour Boys? 

Ace: There were two styles. One was the Soweto style - you know turn-ups in your trousers and so on. Jackie Masike and Maria-Maria Lamola were the Soweto style guys... the hippy style with the bellbottoms was Msomi Khoza and Zero Johnson. They copied Kaizer who was the King of Fashion. Because I also went to America regularly, I had the same style as Kaizer, although Kaizer was tops … he was the one we all copied. 

Steve: Hey, let’s get back to my story about Malombo. So there was Malombo, standing in the hotel room wearing his green leather trousers, yellow shirt, green leather jacket and his green cap, which was also leather.

 Peter: No way.

Steve: Serious. Both Ace and I burst out laughing. Malombo had just come back from playing in Portugal and you know the Portuguese colours are green, yellow and red...

 Peter: Yes.

Steve: Well, Ace said to Malombo, “Hey man, your mind is still in Portugal...you look like a parrot!” Ha, ha.

Ace: Ha, ha, I also said to him, “Malombo, everybody will know you at the party, you’ll never get lost!”

Steve: Later that evening, Ace and I had enough and we wanted to leave but we couldn’t find Malombo. Ace said, “Let’s leave anyway, because dressed like that, Malombo will never get lost. Someone will always be able to see him and now everyone knows him.”

Ace: Hey man, the next morning when we woke up, Malombo was furious with us. He said, “How the hell could you leave me there? I had to walk back. You’ll see, Ace, I’ll get my own back!”

 Peter: So, what happened?

Ace: Steve and I were laughing so much because he was still dressed in the green and yellow leather outfit that we couldn’t take him seriously.

Steve: But the funny thing is that when we landed at Jan Smuts Airport, we were all going to get a lift with Ace. But when we got to Ace’s car, we saw that someone had stolen the hubcaps.

Ace: Malombo took one look at this and said, “You see, guys, you mess with me, I get your hubcaps stolen. Be careful, I am a witchdoctor!”

Steve: Ace straight away said, “Malombo, you dress like a witchdoctor, so maybe you are one!” Ha, ha.

Ace: Malombo was cross but he too could not help but start laughing. It must have looked so funny. Chiefs fans were walking past and the three of us were just leaning against my car laughing our heads off.

Steve: Even Malombo saw the funny side of his outfit by then!

 Peter: Gents, hang on. Allow me to let you in on a secret. You know who’s been listening at the door. (Peter points to the door behind the couch Ace and Steve are sitting on.)

Ace: No, who?

 Peter: Malombo Lechaba! Malombo, did you hear everything? 

Malombo: Ja, you bastards, I should have got rid of you that time already, ha, ha. Listen, I was Ace’s bodyguard. If it wasn’t for me, Ace wouldn’t even be here today. Right, Ace?

Ace: Ha, ha. Anything you say, Malombo. By the way, nice outfit

Malombo: Hey, be careful. I am still much bigger than you, Ace. And as for you, Steve Maseko... You know, Peter, until Ace met me, he couldn’t even drive. I am the one who taught this guy how to drive. If it wasn’t for me, he’d still be walking everywhere.

Peter: Ha, ha. That’s it, Malombo, take no prisoners, go for the jugular...

Malombo: Ha, ha... Hey, I still love you guys.

Ace: Thank goodness for that. Now, Malombo, take it easy.

Steve: Yes, just like Sunday morning.

Malombo: I’ll drink to that.

Peter: Hey, me too …

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